The Arabist

The Arabist

By Issandr El Amrani and friends.

What Islamists say a secular Egypt will look like

In the (extremely unlikely, not to say nearly unimaginable) event that Egypt took a strong turn towards militant secularism, Islamists here have put together a video (linked to by the Muslim Brotherhood's twitter feed) showing what the future of the country will look like. 

Some highlights:

It all starts when in a new constitution in 2012, Egypt no longer designates Islam as the religion of state and removes the references to Sharia as the main source of its legislation. 

  • In 2013, the Egyptian parliament outlaws poligamy.
  • In 2014, women's rights organizations celebrate a new law that gives women equal inheritance rights. 
  • In 2015, women are prohibited from wearing the hegab in public buildings.
  • In 2017, the first movie theater "specializing in porno films" opens.

Obviously sexual freedom spreads, and tourism declines due to the spread of sexual harassment (Ed. Note: This is particularly ironic for those of us aware of the current rates of sexual harassment).

I don't know what's funnier about this video: the hysterically ominous music; the fact that women's rights groups are represented by a grinning blonde drinking a beer; or the way it ends up describing Bizarro Egypt, where up is down, left is right and Islam doesn't dominate every aspect of public life (politicians get in trouble for opening their speeches with "in the name of God.")

It just goes to show that playing on feelings of fear and indignation (even if you are ascendant and everyone is actually scared of you) is at the basis of most politics. More about the video's predictions after the jump.

  • The Ministry of Higher Education decides all students will learn "Islam, Christianity, Judaism and Baha'ism on an equal footing." 
  • In 2019, there is the first gay marriage in Egypt.
  • In 2020, all religious references are removed from official documents and government buildings.
  • In 2022, the call to prayer is prohibited.
  • In 2024, Egypt and Israel sign a joint defense agreement, and an Egyptian soldiers raises an Israeli flag over Gaza.
  • Street fighting breaks out between the religious and secularists.

In the final portion, titles let viewers know that this is what secularists really plan to do, and that all their claims to the contrary ("we're not against religion, just fundamentalism and extremism;" "we just want freedom and equality") are a lie. The video then features images of secularists like feminist Nawal Es-Saadawy, Coptic business tycoon Naguib Sawiris and intellectual and Islamist critic Sayyid El-Qimni

The video sums up by detailing the disastrous effects of secularism on the West, represented by some charts about church attendance, children born out of wedlock and -- the strongest proof -- a broken egg shell with "marriage" written across it. I can't really argue with the indictment of materialism and celebrity magazines -- and then it all ends with an image of laughing Israeli officials.